I know that a lot of people who are overweight hate their bodies. I'm not like that. I just do this weird thing where it's like I'm not aware of myself physically AT ALL. Sometimes I see a photo of myself and think, "Wow, really?" or look in a mirror and realize, "I probably shouldn't wear this outfit." But really, when those moments happen, it's a surprise. I don't think I'm fat. I don't think I'm thin. It's like I don't have a body at all.
Extreme denial, muchly?
Several years ago when I lost quite a bit of weight, the most amazing thing about the whole experience was rediscovering my body. I loved being aware of how my body felt after exercise. I loved seeing how good - or bad - certain styles of clothing looked on me. I loved being able to look at photos of myself and not feeling like I was looking at a stranger. It was such an all-new amazing experience.
I want that again.
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